Thanks for noticing

J., my oldest son, had a friend sleep over last night. His friend is an only child and is always surprised by the reality of our household. With the candor of a seven-year-old, he has suggested a few times that I clean up the house more often. He also reports the twins' escapades to me in a panick=y voice at frequent intervals. It's usually along the lines of "B. is naked!", "G. is on the kitchen counter!" or "B. is jumping on the IPad!". Actually those are all actual quotes from last night.

This morning, while B. and my husband were still sleeping, I took J, G and J's friend out to the kolache and donut shop. We got our treats and sat at a table to eat. After we'd been there a while, J's friend said, "Hey, Greg is doing really well!"

That warmed my heart so much. For one thing, J's friend is getting some perspective on the whole situation. And, he was right, G. was doing really well.

Potty Training Update

Well, apparently I am backing off on the potty training once again. Although we were focusing on G., it was B. who made some improvement. G. just became stressed, aggressive, and started saying, "Sleep? Sleep?" in the middle of the afternoon, hoping I'd put a pull-up on him and put him to bed.

I know that some day, G will use the bathroom. He can wait hours and hours, he can ask for what he needs and he can go when he decides he's ready. We just need to change the location of where he likes to go or actually, HE needs to change the location of where he likes to go.

On a related note, a Hoover SteamVac should be arriving at our house in 3 to 5 business days, and boy is it going to be busy!

Galveston

Since our first family beach trip last year, we've resolved to go down more often, especially in the off times. No one in our family likes a big crowd, but we all love the surf and an empty-as-possible beach. So, this past Saturday we packed up and headed back down to Galveston.

If you are used to New England beaches, it's a bit of an adjustment. To me it doesn't seem as clean, and there's no zoning, so the development on Galveston isn't exactly quaint or charming. On the other hand, you find a nice cross-section of the local poplulation on the beach, with a fun, multi-lingual, multi-cultural feel.

It was very grey and very windy. The boys loved the waves, which seemed a lot bigger than usual. Afterwards we went out to Mooyah Burger, which everybody liked or tolerated really well. When we go out and have such a normal family day, it's a really great feeling.

Church for All!

Oh, I'm so excited! I'm talking to some other people from my church about having a special needs class next year, at least one or two times a month. We've got some boys/young men with moderate autism, a young man with Angelman Syndrome and another young man with Down Syndrome who don't really have anywhere to go during church. They end up in the infant room, which is okay, but not really the best for any of them.

We are thinking about music, sensory activities, crafts (not my idea, but okay), bubbles and so forth.

Inclusion is wonderful, some of the time, but sometimes the opposite of inclusion is even better (well, not exclusion, but you know what I mean).

Potty training, and I mean it this time!

As the twins begin to out-grow any standard pull-ups except the overnight huge ones, the time has come to get serious. We are trying an underwear-only, use the potty every thirty minutes approach. Well, not every thirty minutes for both of them or I'd be totally nuts by now. But we are really doing it with G., who up til now has specialized in waiting seventeen hours to go and then flooding himself and anyone nearby.

And, despite his complete lack of interest, an even smellier house, and tons and tons of carpet cleaner and wet towels, Greg is occasionally going in the potty! He would prefer to hide in a closet, or wait til bedtime when he finally gets a pull-up, but for the first time in his life he is sometimes sitting down on the toilet and actually going.

It's only been two weeks or so, and I foresee many months of this, but it is progress and I am so happy.

Functioning -- high and low and in-between

Overall, I think my mood is pretty good these days. But one thing can still sucker-punch me... other autistic kids seem to progress so fast! I hear people refer to their child as low-functioning or autistic or delayed, and they can do so much more than the twins. This is not what it's cool to blog about. I realize, but I don't have too many readers, so the pressure is off, to some extent.

One thing that works for this mood is to go the blogs of parents with children with much more serious medical or cognitive disabilities. I feel strange saying that, but it is a sure way to help me appreciate the positives in my life. Another thing that really helps is looking at a picture of Greg trying a hamburger.

Gardening

Now that I have all three boys in school full-time (pause here for a sniffle), I find myself trying to re-claim my old self or possibly discover some aspects of a new self. I feel like I'm trying to re-group. I've been donating a LOT of stuff to Goodwill, which makes me very happy. I've also been doing some planting. In my windowsill I have basil, thyme, lavender and rosemary. I've bought some seeds to try growing micro-greens. Outside I've got Texas Sage and phlox of some kind.

I haven't come up with any plan for how to earn money while still being home to get the boys off their buses. I haven't done the "Determination of Mental Retardation" appointment which might get us some services. I haven't made any nifty DVD's for video modeling.

Right now I'm getting rid of old stuff and growing a few new plants and watching old episodes of Community, and that is going to have to do for the time being! Not a bad way to spend some time.

PS That's not actually my Texas sage in the photo. That's what my Texas Sage dreams of being one day far in the future.